In Hopelessness and Near Despair

In hopelessness and near despair
I cry to you, my Savior!
My guilt is more than I can bear,
I have not earned your favor.
You know me as I really am:
How much is truth,
how much is sham;
Why should you heed my pleading?
I see my heart's condition now,
My heart's diverse affections

Why do I love the things you loathe?
I'm torn in two directions:
Now prodigal, now pharisee,
O God, be merciful to me;
Who else but you can help me?
I tremble as I feel your hand,
Expecting retribution,
Yet hear no curse or reprimand,
But grace and absolution:

With you there is forgiveness, Lord,
You speak the sweet, consoling word,
And I am sure you love me!
Forgiven, free of guilt and shame,
Grant me some time to render
A gift to glorify your name,
Love to reflect your splendor:

This world must know what I have learned,
That you bestow what none has earned:
THE JOY OF FULL FORGIVENESS!

Words by Jaroslav J. Vajda
Music by Lee Dengler


Choir practice is a highlight of my week. We work on a wide variety of music and right now the one above is my favorite. The music is haunting, sad and in a minor key until you sing the word "absolution" when the chords become uplifting and in a major key. We spend our time practicing and then time in Bible study and prayer - what a sweet time of worship. The whole evening - worship in study, worship in prayer and worship in song.

Random Thoughts

Who every heard of a 16 year old boy who doesn't want to get his driver's license?

How can you hope to help your kids with their homework when your husband (a former high school math teacher and now doctor) helps your daughter with her proof in Geometry only to have his daughter's Geometry teacher say it is all wrong?

What do you say to your 7 year old who only does half of his homework and doesn't want to finish the rest because "at least it wouldn't be an F"?

How do I make myself get up and clean the kitchen when I would rather continue to sit here holding my new baby reading blogs?

Andrew

Andrew, my 16 year old son, has finally been given permission to enter the world of the blogs. You can find his at www.ajwsmith.blogspot.com

Need a good laugh?

Click on the link above for the best laugh I've had in a really long time :)

Christmas 2005

It has taken us a few years, but we finally got a Christmas picture taken in our own home in front of our own fireplace. Ron had every lamp in the house lighting up our little picture and he still thought it was too dark.

Our family took a wonderful opportunity offered by our church to participate in Advent. Our pastor wrote a devotional book highlighting the four weeks before Christmas - Hope, Peace, Joy, Love with three purple candles and one pink candle - each standing for one week of Advent. Each night we, as a family, lit a candle on our Advent wreath corresponding with the week we were in, we had a devotional, sang a Christmas hymn and had prayer together and then on Christmas Eve we lit all four candles plus a white candle in the middle to represent the Christ Child. It was a special time each night giving us an opportunity to celebrate the coming of our Lord and Savior.



On the morning of Christmas Eve, we flew to California to spend the holiday with my parents and my brother and his wife and kids. One of the special things we were able to do was to visit the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library where the Air Force I used by Ronald Reagan was just retired and opened to the public in October. It was impressive to see this huge airplane inside the building. If you ever visit Southern California, don't miss seeing this important part of history. In the picture below we are standing in front of a piece of the Berlin Wall. We tried to expain the significance of this piece of wall to Brandon and Tyler - Brandon wasn't following - just notice his feet :)

Angels, from the realms of glory, wing your flight o'er all the earth;
Ye who from creation's story, now proclaim Messiah's birth:
Come and worship, come and worship, worship Christ
the newborn King.

Shepherds in the fields abiding, watching o'er your flocks by night,
God with man is now residing, yonder shines the infant Light:
Come and worship, come and worship, worship Christ,
the newborn King.

Sages, leave your contemplations, brighter visions beam afar;
Seek the great Desire of nations; ye have seen his natal star:
Come and worship, come and worship, worship Christ
the newborn King.

Saints before the alter bending, watching long in hope and fear,
Suddenly the Lord, descending, in his temple shall appear:
Come and worship, come and worship, worship Christ,
the newborn King.

All creation, join in praising God the Father, Spirit, Son;
Evermore your voices raising to th'eternal Three in One:
Come and worship, come and worship, worship Christ,
the newborn King.

by James Montgomery

1771-1854